In the four-plus years we’ve been going to Greenville, South Carolina, for Harrison’s care at Shriners Children’s Hospital, people occasionally ask why we don’t just go to Lexington Shriners. It’s an hour to Lexington for us. It’s at least five to Greenville. On paper, that sounds ridiculous for something as simple as, say, a cast change.

So why not Lexington? Why not the closer Shriners?

Short answer: Trust.

Long answer: Keep reading.

How We Got to Greenville

Harrison was born with arthrogryposis. We didn’t know before birth, so there was no plan. We spent a week in the NICU in a fog of shock and a hundred emotions. During those moments of clarity, and through conversations with family and friends, we learned about other children with arthrogryposis from around the area and, through a “friend of a friend,” were given a name that we have been grateful for ever since: Dr. Hyer at the Shriners for Children’s Hospital in Greenville, SC.

We figured we’d get to her, eventually. As we were having our first appointment with our pediatrician, who Jenna had gone to high school with, we learned that she was rather familiar with Greenville and the people at Shriners, as she had done her residency there. It seemed like stars were aligning, and she helped us line up an appointment for late April 2021, when Harrison would be almost two months old. (Not to mention she gave us some brilliant suggestions for stops during those first few months!)

Plans changed. After reviewing his chart, Dr. Hyer’s office called at the end of March and asked how quickly we could come. She felt there was what she called a “golden window” to treat him and wanted to see him immediately. That mattered. She made time. She wanted him in her care.

We were at Shriners in Greenville before Harrison was a month old.

Our First Lexington Experience

In between the NICU and that first Greenville trip, we did go to Lexington. I’ve written about it before. It was our first taste of the other path. I left with a bad taste in my mouth.

We were not ourselves then. Shell-shocked. Mourning. Surviving. But even in that state, some basics are non-negotiable. If we walk into a room for a specific reason, and it’s clear you haven’t read the chart, and you start doing things to my newborn without context or consent, that’s the last time you’re doing that. That experience set the tone for my expectations of care.

Within four weeks of Harrison being born, we had seen the polar opposite ends of the spectrum. Greenville felt focused and prepared. Lexington did not.

Models Matter, But People Matter More

Part of this difference may be structure. In Lexington, Shriners is tightly connected with UK Hospital. The facility is outpatient, and procedures are routed to UK. In Greenville, everything is in-house. For Harrison’s upcoming surgery, he’ll be inpatient right there, in the same hospital where we do our regular visits. Same hallways. Same faces.

I suspect that the in-house model builds pride and continuity. Same team. Same systems. Same follow-through. I’m not saying one model is universally better. I’m saying that our experiences with our kid have been very different.

Also, this: When we bring our son in to be evaluated and the major push is trying to convince us to move all of his care to Lexington, instead of focusing on why we’re in the room, that seals the deal for me.

Willing to Work With Others

Greenville has always been open to collaborating with Harrison’s therapists at Hogg Therapy, with anyone they need to loop in, even with Lexington Shriners, for a cast change if that’s what we want. That spirit has not been reciprocated in our experience with Lexington.

We’ve given Lexington three separate shots because, yes, it would be more convenient. We keep coming back to the same conclusion. Convenience is not the priority. Doing it right is. There’s a reason that two years ago, when Harrison pulled out of a leg cast, we did a 12-hour round trip just for a cast change. We trust the team in Greenville. They’ve never given us a reason not to.

The People Make It

Trust is built in little moments. Michael at the front desk, who greets us and prints our visitor tags for the day. Nurses who talk about and know not just Kentucky, but also of Mount Vernon and Renfro Valley. OR staff, whom we’ll likely be seeing again soon, who are UK fans and know the drive up and down I-75. Therapists who spot Harrison at lunch and call out, “What’s up, HP?”

On our last visit, we were grabbing lunch, and Dr. Hyer stopped to say hi to Harrison and chat with Jenna. She remembered a nurse who adores him, even though he once snuck in a little bite, and said she’d have to let her know he was there that day. That kind of attention sticks. It says, “We see your kid.” It says, “We’re invested.”

And for the record, we are not the family traveling the farthest. We’ve met folks from Texas, Michigan, everywhere. Many of them have Shriners options closer. They chose Greenville, too.

About That “Vibe”

I won’t put words in anyone’s mouth. But in four-plus years in Greenville, whenever Lexington comes up, there’s a vibe. Nobody breaks professional code. Nobody says anything directly. I’ve tried to get a straight answer and have accepted I never will. My read, based on our experience and some careful silence, is that Lexington may not always be the most collaborative partner. Could I be wrong? Sure. I don’t think I am.

Why We’ll Keep Driving

If your question is, “Why do you drive five hours one way for a one or two-hour cast change?” here’s the answer:

Because I trust these people with my son. Because they have shown, over and over, that they care about him and want the most for him. Because they noticed a golden window when he was days old and made space to see him. Because the quality of the caring matches the quality of the care.

So yes, I will always drive five hours down and five hours back, even for something “simple.” A few hours on the road is the least I can do to make sure Harrison gets what he needs.

And for anyone still wondering why we chose Greenville over Lexington. That’s why.